Liishiin Kiisaru (hadamega_ne) wrote in hetalia,
Liishiin Kiisaru

DRABBLE FANFIC: Your House and Mine

Title: Your Home and Mine
Author: hadamega_ne
Genre: Angst
Word Count: 595
Rating: G
Warnings: Prepare for mixed feelings
Summary: In the mind of England on that fateful day ( *ehem* in a manner of speaking).

A/N: I'm concerned to see this is my first completed work for this fandom. It's short and center aligned but I hope it doesn't ruin anyone's day. Cross-posted to [info]usuk .

I've just lost my home today.

It wasn't a place I lived nor where I kept my things.
Nevertheless, it was my home.

Or should I say, 'he' was, but now he's gone.

A home is different in every way from a house.
A home is warm and welcoming, a shelter from the very cruelties of life.
Mine would give me comfort, in the way of sparkling blue eyes and tender smiles.

But no more.

A home is full of history holding hands with nostalgia and happy memories.
I remember when mine would play out in the fields, laugh plenty, sing so sweetly, and wonder at the world around him.
Even as he grew I could see his ever present glow, would be bathed in it

unconditionally as I saw some of my own darkness dissipate.

But no more.

My home has decided to leave me now, and I can't say I blame him.

It was as if he were a dear blanket with a loose string,
as I naively think pulling it will solve my problems, it unravels.
As I cut the strand it only delays the worst.
The wear and use I put into draping it around me for warmth,
clutching it when I'm afraid,
and keeping it near me at all times makes the poor dear unravel again.
My advances make him worse,
as he becomes weary of me I clutch on tighter until there is nothing left.
Nothing at all.


I feel so cold now.
Out of habit I search around for my beloved but then recall that he's not here.
Silly me, I'm so forgetful.
I'm only sitting in a house now, hardly a place I want to stay long.
This place is empty and too big.
It doesn't hug me close like my loving home used to.
It doesn't reveal the joy in my heart and make me smile like the world's in my hands.

This house is dark and scary and silent.
It's blank and colorless, devoid of the personality my home had.
My home sparkled and popped in your face!
He was loud and silly, but able to still be what you needed him to be.
He was a calming place and a safe harbor, familiar but he never ceased to surprise me.
This place that I stare at now with no glow left, with no warmth to fend of the cold, is simply-


It's positively-


I wish there was some way to get my home back, I love him so.
Something tells me that he's lost to me now.

Perhaps if I start to pick up the pieces here in my house,
if I clean up and create something beautiful here in this place that has no color, no appeal, he'll come back.
Perhaps he'll come when he sees how hard I've worked, when he finds I've made my house strong and extravagant.

Please, come back.

I'm ready to keep you warm, to hold you again.
I want to smile and laugh with you, sing, and fend away your darkness.
I can be a blanket to you: I won't care a bit if you wear me through.
I will give you all my joy, if you'll have it, will hug you close.
I wish I could sparkle and pop, catch your attention!
I itch to be silly, I get loud, I yearn to be everything you need me to be!
I ache to be your calming place, the one you turn to.

Please come back...
Come back home.

I want to be your home too.


I looked at my title to this and thought it was off for some reason. But when I thought about it, the title made a pretty solid sentence when I added two words:

(I'm) Your Home and (You're) Mine.

It's not a very dynamic title with the two words added but it sums up everything that we'd hope for at the very end. We wish everything would be equally fulfilling for both and fully reciprocated. Somebody needs a big hug. ;-;

Tell me what you think, I've never written angst nor have I ever finished anything so this was a pleasant surprise that came to me two hours ago.
...I need some sleep.


Tags: -england, fan: fic

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